Bernice Shanley
Bernice Shanley, Sioux Falls, SD, formerly of Aberdeen, SD, passed away Thursday, May 8, 2025, at Touchmark at All Saints in Sioux Falls. She was 94.
Bernice Heupel Shanley was born on September 5, 1930, in Eureka, South Dakota to August and Bertha (Mettler) Heupel. She joined six older siblings, followed by one younger sister. The family lived in and around Forbes, North Dakota. Bertha died when Bernice was nine years old. The children went in different directions, Bernice was raised by friends and family. Years later, August remarried, adding three half-sisters. As a young teenager, Bernice boarded a train to head west to work summers near her older sisters who lived in Yakima, WA. It was during one of these trips that she met her first husband, Robert Agee; after marriage, they settled in Helena, Arkansas. They had three children, Kip, Gene, and Sheila. When they divorced in 1955, the boys stayed in Arkansas with Robert. Bernice and Sheila moved to Aberdeen, South Dakota.
While working as a waitress/bartender at The Flame, Bernice met the love of her life, Earl Shanley. They married on April 16, 1961. Earl’s two daughters, Jane and Gail, lived in Athol with their mother. Bernice and Earl embraced their life and work in Aberdeen, and they enjoyed traveling all over the United States and Hawaii. They enjoyed camping in their SportsCoach. Since they were avid fishermen, they mostly camped at lakes or the Missouri River. It seems like Bernice always caught the most and biggest fish. Favorite memories include eating freshly caught walleye for breakfast—Bernice style. The two also enjoyed mixing with their many wonderful friends playing cards, dancing, and bowling.
Bernice worked hard her whole life - primarily in food service. The United Methodist Church in Aberdeen benefited from Bernice’s eagerness to share her cooking skills, her help with funeral and wedding luncheons, and other special events like the fall fair.
Her gardens produced cucumbers, tomatoes, and other vegetables that ended up in tasty dishes that she shared at family gatherings or church potlucks. Her pickled beets were blue-ribbon worthy. It was discovered much later that she did not like beets, but would pickle them for others to enjoy. She was a master quilter of bed and lap quilts enjoyed by many friends and family members.
Earl died in March 2008. Bernice was very saddened at losing Earl. In her typical style, she dealt with her grief by identifying it, naming it and moving on. She sold their Aberdeen home of nearly 50 years, and in 2012 she moved to the Brandon area to live in an apartment with her four cats in her daughter’s backyard. Bernice continued to enjoy playing cards with new friends (even more when she won!). Her second-floor four-season room gave her great views of the prairie landscape, birds, deer and turkeys. She found new joy in feeding, watching, and identifying the birds.
On an early day in April 2022, she was heading out to feed her birds when a 50 mph gust knocked her down, causing a compound fracture of her left femur. Even surgery and months of rehab did not help her walk again. With her worsening dementia, it was clear she could not return to her apartment. She moved into Touchmark memory care in June 2022. They embraced her spirit and called her “Spicy." She received kind and compassionate care while there—We thank you! When death was near she was blessed with the added caring support of Avera Hospice—We thank you!
She is survived by her three children and their spouses: Kip and Laura Agee (Broken Arrow, OK), Gene Agee (Tulsa, OK), Sheila Agee and LuAnn Eidsness (Sioux Falls, SD); step daughters Jane Bahr (Gresham, OR) and Gail McGee (Sioux Falls, SD); grandchildren Kim Burke, Jodi Agee, Michael (Jaime) Agee, Bobby Agee, Nathan (Lindsay) McGee and Mattie McGee (Brian) Anderson; 11 great grandchildren, six great great-grandchildren. She has two sisters: Freda Trenkenshuh, in Yakima, WA, and Rosemary Selby in Oklahoma City, OK; and several nieces, nephews, and friends.
She was preceded in death by her parents, siblings Gideon Heupel, Gertrude Trenkenshuh, Helmet Heupel, Gladys Eide, Priscilla Heupel, Agnes Koerner, Katherine Heupel, and Tina Pulver; her husband Earl, daughter-in-law Kathy Agee, grandson Chris Agee, and great-grandson Jack Agee.